I was tasked with coming up with a system to assist humans in their enlightenment process - to conceive of what would have to happen to the world and what I would have to design in order to affiliate maximum enlightenment - see the clock is running out so far just about no one is set to finish the game and get off planet so the stakes are high. Apparently Steve Jobs did this too and so does Elon Musk. ETs told them to just like they told me to. These systems are called Enlightenment Simulations and because I couldn’t be kidnapped and placed in one physically, Elon inserted mine in my DNA. My systems are consent-based, thank you very much
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The New Earth Healing Centres (FAIL)
I wanted to make pockets of free and sustainable walkable villages where people could rest, heal, and explore their passions but we ran simulations and in every timeline all the people turned on me and made me out to be a cult leader. In many they arrested or even killed me. It’s too bad because this would have been nice but peole are entitled and vindictive so we had to go with a more brutal approach.
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Collapsing the Systems
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We send out dogwhistles for enlightenment candidates and draw them to our secret place for healing and procesing - it’s a very cool place
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The 19805s childhood Redux CANADALAND
We use the programming of Robin’s torture life to imprint enlightenment protocols - having candidates live for two years in a simulated low income 1980s suburb. There is a lot to this imprinting so come explore all its details.
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The Crucible
The final stage - to test your mastery and impeccability. Most will not survive this